Growing up I was always consumed in what others thought of me and worried about the opinions of those around me, this prevented me from being able express my true self and stopped me from fully being who I am. After taking a year out from education and travelling to Central America, I fully let loose and discovered who I am amongst all the crazy journeys staring out of windows on a fully packed chicken bus, jumping of cliff edges, camping on live volcanoes and most imortantly meeting some of the most beautiful people who taught me how to have a free soul.
The first step you need to take in order to fully gain self confidence in yourself is to stop asking for other peoples opinions. This can be a really hard step and you will often find yourself subcontiously asking for opinions, however every time you go to ask, remind yourself of your own ability to make these decisions.
The reason you should not ask for opinions is because YOU are valuable, your thoughts are valuable, only YOU have lived your life, only YOU are capable of detecting all of your dreams and interests, only YOU are capable of understanding your pleasures and pains, therefore no one else's thoughts are more valueable than your own when making decisions for YOUR life. You know yourself better than anyone else, you always have good intentions for yourself. When you ask for an opinion you are showing that you don’t trust yourself, this will lead to a decline in self confidence.
An opinion from someone else contains all of their life experiences, their insecurities and their beliefs meaning that you load all of that onto yourself, your loading someone else's life onto yours, when the truth is that you have lived a life full of experiences that can guide you to fulfil your upmost potential. Listening to yourself will allow you to be your most authentic self and live a life that you want to. We are biologically created to protect ourselves as a species, you have inbuilt biological processes that make you the most loyal person to yourself without doubt. Realise this beauty of protection you provide yourself and allow your opinion to guide you to the safest, happiest place.
Why are you allowing yourself to devalue your opinions of yourself because of others? We are all humans, no one is more valueable than you, status is a man made concept, we are ALL destined for the same ending. Therefore nobody else's opinion can be more valuable to your life than your own. When you understand this, you can understand that every-time you listen to someone else's opinion about you and let it affect you and direct you, you are undermining the beauty that being yourself provides to achieve success in your eyes.
Trust your ideas and art. If you think your beliefs are true don't hold back from sharing them, don't be scared of what others will say. A helpful tool that will help you understand the irrelavance of others opinions, is simply understadning how irrelevant your opinions on others are too. When we see someone strange looking doing something out of the norm, we may think the odd comment, however these thoughts dont actually deep down have the intention to damage someones self esteem or stop them doing what they are doing, and if anyone does make judgements with the intent of changing someone, this 100% stems from their own insecurities; therefore opinions should not direct your life, otherwise you will lose who YOU are.
People will always have negative opinions about you no matter what, we cannot please everyone, not even Beyonce can. The negative opinions should be used simply as a lens to understand human nature. Understand that letting someone else's opinions have an affect on you is letting their thoughts, dreams, interests, pleasures, pains, fears from their experiences be applied to your life, which will direct you away from the life that your being wants for you. Someone else's opinion is not made to protect you, neither do they align with your dreams and aspirations so we should slowly start to train oursleves to stop asking for them.
When we listen to nasty comments and internalise them, this will naturally bring more negativity into our lives. You will notice once you allow your own thoughts to guide your life, then life will slowly bring to you what you desire and want. Your positivity and ability to be authentic and confident will naturally show through to those around you and you will attract more positivity and people will naturally start to believe in you. Thank you for taking the time to read this blog, I hope you all are succesful on your quest towards improving your self confidence and discovering your true self.
